Tuesday, January 7, 2014

Long blog, sorry.

So I posted a few days ago about what was coming up today, "the big spanking" for disrespect. He wanted to wait on Tuesday (today) because of my period.  Well I talked to HOH a few days ago and asked him if he would please break it up over a few days, and he said he would think about it.   He finally told me that he would break it up for me. That disrespect the other day earned me 21 minutes, and not an easy 21 minutes. (that's not including anything I might get in trouble for)  He told me I wouldn't be able to sit for a week.   (That was when he was going to do it all on Tuesday.)

Plus, this spanking has been coming for a few days from when I acted disrespectful, and I feel bad for the disrespect.  It has just been lingering over my head, I felt/feel bad, and I needed to submit.  I needed some sort of discipline to start easing the guilt for my actions, to show him that I respect him and his power over me.  So I sent him some text messages explaining that.  I told him I would submit to any discipline action, no matter how humiliating and to please not wait until Tuesday. 

So last night I was working out and wasn't home, and that part was fine.  However we also had unexpected/expected (at the last minute) company last night.  So I come home, still sweaty and my back end cold and instantly he takes me into the other room and knew it was for some sort of discipline.  I kept telling him I needed a shower first and he said he knew that.  That didn't stop him, because of my text messages  and also due to the circumstances of having company, he was going to go through with giving me some sort of discipline. Which I am grateful to him for.   He told me to pull down my pants and panties ( because of limited time he didn't make me fully undress) and bend over.  (which I did, there was something in front of me to grab)  He took that wooden spoon and for 2 minutes gave me a good, hard, solid, deserved spanking. I think about 30 seconds into it I was crying because it hurt.  I kept reminding myself that it was deserved and it was for my disrespect and he didn't deserve that from me and that this is some of my discipline for it.  

So that took 2 minutes off of my 21 so far for the week.  So if I can manage to keep my mouth shut and follow the rules I have 19 minutes left for the disrespect.  

I have to say that I truly, with all my heart, love our DD, TiH, TTWD lifestyle/relationship.

It changes who each of us are in our relationship.  He is more dominant now than ever, (even before we fell off the wagon for a few months and restarted a few weeks ago) and I am more submissive and each day we are growing more and more into our roles.    We know our roles, we know who we are in our marriage.   It makes for a peaceful household, but also makes up so much more closer.

Yes, should I be submissive anyway?  Do I need the threaten of a spanking or whatever humiliating discipline he comes up with to "fit the infraction?"  Do I need this lifestyle to respect him?   The answer to these questions are yes, and no.

Yes I want to be submissive, but no its not easy.  Today we live in a world that women have to act equal and we simply are not.   That doesn't mean we are "lower" or a doormat, it means that the HOH  makes the rules and we abide by them.   

Do I need a threaten of a spanking?  Yes.  Because again we live in a world that forces it down your  throat to not answer to anyone.  So yes I need the threat of a spanking or some sort of discipline to keeps me in check reminding me that I do have someone to answer to, and that is my HOH.   I know my husband loves me enough to make sure that happens. 

I respect my HOH with or without this lifestyle.   However, my respect for my HOH grew by leaps and bounds when we started this lifestyle a year ago.  Then when we fell off the wagon for a couple of months, it was still there but not as strong, but still there nonetheless.   Now that we are back full force with our lifestyle, and that respect for him as a man, my owner, the HOH is deeper and stronger than it has EVER been.  

I love him more and more, and feel closer to him than ever.  I am his, and he takes care of me.  He loves me for everything that I am, and I love him!   I am not easy to handle, I am strong willed, sarcastic, and sassy, so his job is not easy, but he does it. 

So tonight it's 5-7 minutes of spanking for just that, and I hope I don't get into any other trouble or it will be longer, and this time we don't have any company so I know it will be worse.  I know it will be the entire spanking process, undressing and getting into position. 

While I am dreading it big time, (so dreading it)  I am also thankful for it because I want this discipline to go away along with that episode of horrible disrespect.  Once the final 21 minutes is over this week then I can stop feeling guilty about acting horrible to my HOH........until next time I run off at the mouth. 

I am the sort of person that runs off at the mouth first before thinking and that is what gets me in trouble, along with time management.    With that being said, I need to close out this blog before I get into more trouble. 

~Jane

5 comments:

  1. Hello Jane, and glad to have you back.

    No need to feel defensive of you lifestyle. The main thing is that it is what you both want and what you both feel is right for you. We all do this in different ways and for different reasons.

    In our marriage we are equal partners - but after discussions Dan ALWAYS has the final say and makes all the decisions. Strangely, he has always done this. It's just that now I get spanked. Not quite in quite the same way as you, but like you, it has strengthened what we already had, and reinforced our love and respect for each other.

    Sadly I think that couples don't have the respect for each other they should have, and I know I can be pretty guilty in that area every now and again. Poor communication can be one cause of this, and it is only because of our dynamic we have discovered that we were both not so good at talking and listening to one another as we thought we were. I know I find I listen much better when over Dan's lap!

    I hope you continue to grow in your love and understanding of each other, as we have.

    Many hugs
    Ami

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    1. Hey Ami,

      Thank you for your wonderful reply!

      Yes, like you I feel the same. Its sad that so many couples don't respect each other.

      Living this lifestyle does help with communication a lot!

      Maybe I didn't word it correctly, we are equal partners, but not equal when it comes to making decisions. This world we live in tries to force us to not believe in the man taking the lead. I have seen so many things over the years where women have posted or said something to the effect that their husband better not think he is the head and they think it's old school, old fashion.

      But the sad fact is when you look back in older times the divorce rate was almost unheard of. There was no power conflict, it was plain and simple. The husband was the head, and he would listen to his wife, and he made the final decision. At times if she didn't listen, or overstepped him, or got attitude, over the knee she would go for a good ole fashion spanking.

      It's funny today because I see these women on TV shows or just out and about in shopping centers talking to their husbands and you can see they have NO respect. I look at them and think they need to be spanked or disciplined! LOL

      ~Jane

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  2. Very well stated Jane. No one said this lifestyle is easy. It takes alot of work. But the rewards far out way any negatives that may come into play. Recognizing when we slip, and submitting to the consequences regardless of how tough will only strengthen your relationship. Hang in there, sounds like you will have to endure a little more pain to reach the other side...

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    1. Thank you Catherine!

      Your right no one said this lifestyle is easy, but the benefits are amazing.

      Yeah right now my behind is sore! 6 minutes last night, and then 7 tomorrow. Then I will be completely done for that episode of disrespect.

      Jane

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  3. This reply is essentially a duplicate because it was originally posted to the wrong thread.

    Younger generations of women tend to be disrespectful because, quite frequently, their fathers were either not around or didn't bother to teach their daughters to respect men.

    When we were dating, my wife told me about two thoroughly memorable spankings from her father. One was when, as a mouthy young teen, she was soundly spanked after sassing her mother. The other occurred when she was home from college and talked back to her father.

    In contrast, during a counseling session a few years ago, a young woman frankly confessed her problems with young men resulted from never having been put over a man's knee and spanked!

    Another woman admitted getting spanked by her husband would greatly improve her marriage.

    While these admissions are rare, they suggest women recognize there is a link between getting spanked and showing respect.

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